A Trilogy of Alice Cooper Songs About Domestic Abuse

Alice Cooper -- the guy in greasepaint who regularly snuggles with a giant snake and decapitates himself onstage during live performances -- has long been a champion of women. For starters, he was one of the founding fathers of androgyny in music. While Little Richard was in touch with his feminine side in the 1950s and David Bowie perfected gender bending in the '70s, Vincent ...

Love and Universal Monsters

Inside the beating heart of every horror fan is a closet romantic, armchair psychologist, or misanthrope with a glimmer of idealism left in their soul. While horror on the Silver Screen stretches back to silent film era, Universal Studios gave rise to "the monster" as a sympathetic -- and often tragically romantic -- figure. With Valentine's Day just around the corner, there's no better time ...

A Guide to Writing Bad Erotic Fiction

I've always had a love of words and genre-based fiction. One genre I haven't delved into is erotica. In the spirit of experimentation, I'm trying my sticky, cramped-up hand at it. But I don't want to write just any erotica. Certainly not the pablum peddled in best-sellers and most appreciated when read aloud by the late, great Gilbert Gottfried. Nope. I want to write bad ...

I Listened to “Loyal (West Coast Version)” by Chris Brown On Repeat For An Hour

A crisp autumn wind has blown across the East Coast, reminding me that my blog has lain dormant since the summer -- specifically, when I decided to compare and contrast breakfast sandwich offerings. I've been swinging between feeling uninspired and mentally berating myself for not even attempting to write. So, after scratching my ass for a topic to write about, I fell back on one of ...

It’s Not Sexism. Your Gender-Swapped Remake Just Sucks.

Within the past decade, Hollywood has been whizzing on the viewing public with a steady, pungent, yellow stream of lukewarm remakes. Often dubbed "reboots" or "re-imaginings," the writers, producers, and whomever greenlights this hot garbage continue to underwhelm with their ability to take something that wasn't broke and attempt to "fix" it by passing off someone else's once-imaginative work as their own hackneyed reinterpretation. The latest ...

Sympathy for Cersei: Why Game of Thrones’ Bad Bitch Ain’t So Bad

You gotta hand it to Cersei Lannister. Between last year's season finale and this year's, Cersei went from rock bottom to the top of the heap. She ended last season having endured a traumatic naked "walk of shame" through the streets of King's Landing after being beaten and starved for an extended period of time... and given a terrible haircut. This season, Cersei (literally) put all of ...

5 Characters In Search of a Way Out of The Friend Zone

There comes a time in everyone's life where they find themselves falling for a friend. You think that the bond you share can be escalated to a deeper, more romantic level. Sometimes, you get the fairy tale. Other times, you hear the magic words: "I don’t want to ruin our friendship.” That's when your worst fears have been confirmed: You've been banished to the dark ...

Not Just Poop: Other Weird Things You Find Working in a Library

Philadelphia has its share of colorful characters who have a penchant for disturbing, yet hilarious antics. We can proudly lay claim to being the home of the Swiss Cheese Pervert and now we can look to nearby Bryn Mawr for our latest noteworthy miscreant: the guy who took a dump in his local library.  According to a cadre of librarians from around the country quoted by ...

The Death Box: A Non-Existent Product You’ll Love!

I'll be the first to admit that I've got my weird moments. I'll also probably be the last to judge you harshly for your own. Will I laugh? Oh, you betcha... But I won't judge. With that sentiment in mind, I recently read about a product called 21 Grams, a memory box that contains essential elements to remind a person of their deceased loved one. I ...

Cheez Doodles: The Legend of the Swiss Cheese Pervert

Updated June 2014: This blog post was originally published on March 25, 2009 -- five years before Philadelphia's Swiss Cheese Pervert escalated his activities and began driving around the region, flashing his cold cuts and asking unsuspecting women if they wouldn't mind watching him get his rocks off while he diddled himself with dairy.  The Swiss Cheese Pervert was eventually apprehended and plead guilty to indecent exposure and harassment ...