The Batman: A Review & Watch-Along Snark

Let's cut to the chase. (As one does after enduring a movie with a three-hour runtime.) I didn't hate The Batman, the latest entry in the never-ending parade of films focused on DC's Caped Crusader. However, I didn't love it. I'll rundown the high and low points of the film, along with a final verdict. And then, if you're so inclined to watch the film yourself ...

A New Year’s Herring Sandwich For Luck

The last two years have been a real pisser, eh? Coming off another hard candy pandemic Christmas, feelings of weariness are mingled with a glimmer of cautious optimism. I'm still hopeful that 2022 has good things in store for all of us, if we're so inclined to look for a silver lining. That said, do you know what else has a silver lining? Pickled herring! Stay ...

Another Pandemic Christmas

In a 21-month period that's been a constant stream of anxiety, panic porn, and incessant carrot-dangling with regard to the promise of a return to normalcy, it would seem that the holiday season would offer a welcome respite from the 24-7 fuckery. Rather, the pressure to be cheerful, upbeat, and cling to tradition on top of feeling as if you're living in a prequel to ...

I Listened to “Loyal (West Coast Version)” by Chris Brown On Repeat For An Hour

A crisp autumn wind has blown across the East Coast, reminding me that my blog has lain dormant since the summer -- specifically, when I decided to compare and contrast breakfast sandwich offerings. I've been swinging between feeling uninspired and mentally berating myself for not even attempting to write. So, after scratching my ass for a topic to write about, I fell back on one of ...

Are Kolchak: The Night Stalker and Blade Runner Connected?

Carl Kolchak is my patron saint. Yes, I am well aware that he’s not real and just the title character of the occult-themed ‘70s TV show, Kolchak: The Night Stalker. There’s something comforting about his disheveled seersucker suit and equally disheveled approach to news writing. The comfort factor only doubles when you consider that Kolchak was played by Darrin McGavin — “The Old Man” himself from ...

The Road Behind: Thoughts on Supernatural’s Final Episode

The last episode of Supernatural, television's longest-running genre series, has finally aired and I don't know how I feel about it. Having watched from the beginning, it's tough to say goodbye to a show that was a fixture of my Thursday nights for nearly 15 years. Supernatural is one of those shows that, when you meet someone else who watches it and has just as ...

Review: Marilyn Manson – WE ARE CHAOS

Listening to a new album by a favorite artist is like getting coffee with an old friend you haven't seen in a few years and hoping they haven't turned into a total cunt in the time that's elapsed. Sometimes, you pray for it to be over and find yourself content with the memories of a time gone past. And in some instances, you pick up ...

A Letter to 11-Year-Old Me

Dear 11-year-old Lana, You're not gonna believe this shit, but this is Future Lana writing to you from the year 2020. Crazy, right? Speaking of crazy, that word doesn't even begin to describe this year. Remember how you were obsessed with and creeped out by that "In The Year 2525" song that Mom used to play on the Oldies channel? Welp, 2020 isn't quite that weird, but ...