Summer is winding to a close. Technically, summer doesn’t officially end until September 21st. Yet, even without Jerry Lewis warbling “You’ll Never Walk Alone” into the late night telethon hours,*…
It’s early September and the long, hot days of summer are winding to a close. Halle-fuckin’-lujah! Summer can suck it. Yes. It’s an unpopular opinion. However, for those of us…
Thirty different ways to talk to you on my phone / / Just as many ways tonight to be alone – lyrics from “I’ll Be In Touch” by Electric Six…
We’re halfway through January, in that liminal space between continuing to go after New Year’s resolutions with the fervor of a horny teen (literally and figuratively) coming across his dad’s…
Most fright fiends will happily give you a TED Talk about their favorite classic movie monster or have a Perry Mason-level defense prepared for the cinematic merit of Troma films….
Every office or workplace — even NASA — needs a resident comedian to help boost morale and keep the team laughing. Especially on days when you or your coworkers feel…
When you’re beaned in the head with a variety of things, you sometimes forget the lengthy list of objects that have made contact with your skull. During my 45 years…
Picture it: New Year’s Eve. 2021. I was in the kitchen, attempting to slice up a baguette that had gotten unexpectedly rock hard. (Heh. That’s what she said!) While sawing…
In a 21-month period that’s been a constant stream of anxiety, panic porn, and incessant carrot-dangling with regard to the promise of a return to normalcy, it would seem that…
I got up to pee, squinting my eyes at the clock to see what time it was. It was 3am on September 3rd, 2020. Then it hit me. Shit. It…