Pop Culture. Crude Humor. Bottom Feeding Attempts at Intellectualism.
The past few days following the Christmas holiday have yielded several memorable SEPTA commutes to work. The buses are running on schedule with most of the holiday jumpers who enjoy flinging themselves onto the tracks in a desperate cry for attention help having already gotten it out of their system. The buses are also curiously quiet with many of the public and private schooligans at ...
There's a party in your pants! And Kotex says "U" are invited! For several decades, Kotex has been providing me with feminine hygeine products designed to staunch my menstrual flow. Ironically, they've also gifted me with steady stream of unintentional comedy through the years, too. The term "sanitary napkin" still makes me giggle with immaturity, usually because I think of a "napkin" as something I use ...
I’ve just downed the KFC Double Down, a sandwich that initially sounded like a joke: Bacon, cheese, and some sort of spicy mayo sauce sandwiched between two pieces of juicy, KFC chicken coated in the Colonel’s “11 secret herbs and spices.” Bread? Who needs it!? Adding to the hilarity, there’s a whopping 540 calories, 32 grams of fat, and just ONE single, solitary gram of fiber in this meaty ...
Dear Nike, I’ve seen the commercial with Tiger Woods looking all sad-faced and sorry. Since you’re still endorsing him, can you lengthen the five-character limit on your Tiger Woods Nike ID sneakers so that I can fit “I want to treat you rough. Throw you around, spank & slap you…Hold you down while i choke you & fuck that ass that i own” on my custom shoe? ...
I didn’t think it was possible, but Madison Avenue has given me someone else to hate even more than the FreeCreditReport.com douchebag. Although my hatred of the “Credit Score Whore,” has waned and given way to a begrudging tolerance of his presence on my television screen, commercials following the one I had initially written about bore him out to be less of an opportunistic ass than ...
This weekend, I was kicking back and watching TV with my boyfriend when a commercial featuring a showering centaur shilling for Old Spice popped on the tube. [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=06TBhGrzyN4] Asking a perfectly, normal, rational question, my significant other posed to me a conundrum stemming from the commercial regarding the implications of interspecial attraction and ensuing relations: “Do chicks find centaurs attractive?” I paused to think for a moment. I couldn’t ...
A certain series of commercials have really been chapping my ass as of late. Undoubtedly, you too have probably seen those FreeCreditReport.com commercials, replete with pithy jingles lauding the importance of checking that all-important credit score that determines just how often you shit, eat, get laid, etc. The star of these commercials is some Average Joe schlub with an accoustic guitar and oh-so fashionably shabby wardrobe ...
